Workplace Etiquette

21 Dos and Don’ts of the Workplace

When it comes to working in an office or other professional setting, etiquette matters. How you present yourself and interact with those around you—whether your coworkers, supervisors, or direct reports—speaks to who you are as a person and as a member of the team and can directly influence the trajectory of your career.

I’ve been working in New York City for the duration of my post-grad life, ever since Northeastern’s commencement in May 2012. But I’ve actually been learning about the professional world since December 2008, when I began working at my first co-op. 

In that time, through trial, error, and observation, I’ve learned a lot about what works in the workplace—as well as what doesn’t. 

Because etiquette is so important to professional success, I wanted to share useful tips that other graduates can use as they begin to enter the professional workforce, whether as part of an internship, co-op, or postgraduate life. I polled a few friends (most are fellow Huskies) and coworkers, and this is a compilation of our advice.  

Workplace etiquette: the don’ts

Let’s face it: There are certain actions and behaviors you just shouldn’t bring with you into a professional workplace. Doing so can have major negative impacts on your career. But for many individuals, proper workplace etiquette does not come as intuitively as you might think. Below are some of the biggest don’ts of office life. 

1. Don’t “reply all” to an email chain.

Understand the differences—and repercussions—between hitting “reply” and “reply all” when responding to an email. Carefully consider whether or not all of the parties who received the initial email need to be included in your reply. Additionally, by “replying all,” you may find yourself embarrassed as your entire organization reads details that were only meant to be shared with one or two others. 

When in doubt, always do your part to keep emails and other correspondences friendly and professional. As a general rule, treat your emails as a professional form of communication, and make sure that the information you share is appropriate for the time, place, and people involved.

2. Don’t have personal conversations at your desk.

If you work in an office and you must have a private or personal phone conversation when you’re at work, try not to have the conversation at your desk where others can hear you. Many workplaces have conference rooms that you can use for phone calls; otherwise, it might be a good idea to step outside.

Having a personal conversation at your desk can be distracting to the coworkers near you, and it may open you up to gossip about being someone who “can’t leave their personal life at home”—which isn’t good for your professional image.

3. Don’t bring your emotions into the office.

It’s best to leave your personal emotions at the door when you get to work. Your desk neighbor doesn’t want to hear your sob story from over the weekend. If you truly can’t focus on your work because something has happened, it’s probably a better idea to take some personal time to process your emotions. Or, if something in the workplace is bothering you, reach out to the human resources department or your supervisor to resolve the issue so it doesn’t interfere with your work.

4. Don’t be afraid to ask questions.

Asking questions—no matter how silly they may seem—will help you clarify expectations and avoid erroneously completing an entire project only to realize you did it all wrong. There’s little worse than overconfidence—especially if it isn’t actually backed up by experience or skill. 

So go ahead and ask your questions, and be sure to truly listen to the answer.

5. Don’t gossip about fellow co-workers…or your boss.

Gossiping is one of the cardinal sins of office work: Just don’t do it. Whether you’re tempted to gossip about your boss, co-worker, or the company as a whole, you’re not hurting anyone but yourself when you do. 

Gossiping can portray you as someone who can’t be trusted or someone who isn’t a team player, which won’t help you reach your professional goals. It can also be duly harmful if it gets back to the target of the gossip.

6. Don’t use emojis or multiple exclamation points (if any) in work emails.

Disclaimer: This bit of advice will depend on the specifics of your workplace. Some workplaces may embrace emojis and relaxed conversation; others may expect a level of formality at all times. Regardless, be cognizant and intentional when crafting your communications. Work emails don’t need to be all serious all the time, but you’ll want to maintain a sense of professionalism so that others see you as the competent expert that you are. 

When in doubt, always communicate professionally in your workplace emails, regardless of how relaxed your superiors might seem. After you’ve spent some time on the job, you’ll have a better idea of what is deemed appropriate in your workplace.

7. Don’t talk back to your boss.

This bit of advice should probably go without saying, but it’s an important one nonetheless. Even if there isn’t much of an age difference between you and your boss, you should never talk back to them. Always show your boss respect, and do your part to not be sarcastic or glib.

This is not to say you can’t disagree with them about aspects of the job, a project, or the company’s strategy. You should always feel free to share thoughts or concerns if you’ve got them. But the way that you do this matters.

Hopefully, you will have the chance to climb the career ladder someday. You will want to have your boss in your corner to help you get there.

8. Don’t forget that at work events, you’re still at work.

Company outings can be a great chance to socialize with your coworkers and get to know them outside of their nine-to-five personas. But while you should be yourself, it’s important to remember that you’re still among office mates who you’ll be working side by side with tomorrow. Be especially careful not to overdo it if alcohol is being served. Everyone will know why you “called in sick” the next day.

9. Don’t be nervous, but also don’t overstep your boundaries.

In the workplace, you’ll often find yourself walking a fine line in how you present yourself. You want to be respectful, but you don’t want to come across as being stuffy; you want to appear confident, but you don’t want to overstep your bounds; you want to express your opinions, but you need to keep them G-rated.

Learning the balance will take trial and error on your part, but it’s an important balance to learn.

10. Don’t forget an umbrella.

This one might sound silly, but it’s important to be prepared for all of life’s annoyances, even at work. Sitting in wet clothes all day is not fun. Walking around with a coffee-stained shirt because your coffee lid popped off is not fun. Talking to someone with spinach stuck between your teeth from lunch is not fun. 

Keeping an umbrella, spare pair of shoes, dental floss, and even a change of shirt in your desk (or the trunk of your car) for emergencies can be smart.

Workplace etiquette: the dos

1. Do arrive early.

There’s some common advice often given to new workers: You want to be in the office before your boss and stay until after he or she leaves. You will be remembered for answering your phone at 8:01 a.m. in a world where tardiness is common (especially in major cities, where traffic can cause all kinds of headaches). Conversely, you will also be noticed if you consistently show up 15 minutes after everyone else—just not in the way you want. 

2. Do network with people outside of your cubicle.

Of course, it’s important that you complete your work on time and up to standard. But it’s also important to remember that a perk of having a job at a company you appreciate is meeting other people with similar interests who can share advice from their past experiences that you can use on the job. 

That’s why it’s important to take networking opportunities seriously, especially when you’re first starting on the job. Grabbing coffee or lunch with your co-workers, attending happy hour or other company functions, and simply making yourself available can go very far.

3. Do be willing to help out a co-worker.

If one of your co-workers asks you for help in completing a task, you should generally say yes —as long as you feel that you can realistically help them while also hitting your own deadlines. This is an opportunity to stand out and demonstrate your own knowledge and skills. It’s also an opportunity to make a friend and bring someone into your corner for the future; you never know when that might come in handy.

4. Do bring in goodies.

Who doesn’t love to eat? Baking cookies, brownies, or some other treats if you have free time one night or just picking up some bagels on the way in to the office can be a really nice gesture for your coworkers—especially if they’re celebrating a big win or going through a stressful period. 

If you do choose to bring in treats, though, it’s important to understand ahead of time whether any of your co-workers have allergies or dietary restrictions like gluten sensitivity. Bringing something in that everyone can enjoy will only make the gesture that much more meaningful.

5. Do create a proper personal email address.

It isn’t uncommon to need to communicate with your co-workers after hours or on the weekend. While many organizations allow employees to log into work email remotely, some do not. It’s important in these cases that you have a professional email address in the event you need to send an email to a co-worker or your boss. “Foxychick123” isn’t going to send the same impression as “firstname.lastname”.

6. Do jump at the chance to complete a new task.

If you’re asked to work on a task that you’ve never worked on in the past, it’s natural to feel nervous. But that’s no reason to decline the work. Accepting new projects expands your skill set and can lead to exciting opportunities down the line. 

You were likely chosen because they have confidence in your abilities. Just make sure to ask questions, seek advice, and make sure you’re on the right track before getting too bogged down in the task.  

7. Do be flexible.

Sometimes, you’re going to be tapped for a project or initiative that requires you to be flexible. You might be asked to work earlier or later hours than usual; you might be asked to perform duties or tasks that you don’t necessarily want to perform, or that you weren’t hired to do. There may come a day when you are asked to work a holiday—either to cover someone else’s shift or to usher a project through to completion. 

While it’s never fun to work a holiday or weekend or to do “someone else’s job,” being willing to roll with the punches demonstrates that you value the company and take your role seriously, which will only help you in the long run. 

8. Do dress appropriately for the office.

What constitutes appropriate will depend on the particular culture of your workplace. But it’s always a good idea to dress to impress, especially when you’re first starting a new role at a company. Even if you don’t have a formal dress code, save the crop tops, flip-flops, and see-through shirts for the weekend—no one will take you seriously if you don’t.

9. Do make sure your earbuds are plugged in securely to your computer.

Have you ever made the mistake of listening to music or a video on your laptop while in public, only to realize that your earbuds weren’t plugged in and that everyone around you could hear? Talk about embarrassing.

Take it from me: It’s only more embarrassing in the workplace. Your coworkers don’t want to hear lyrics streaming from your 2 Chainz Pandora station.

10. Do be open-minded.

Whether you’re taking on new work, building relationships, or advancing in your career, you should do your best to remain open-minded. Nothing is known for certain, and being flexible and open to change will only help you in the long run.

And finally …

11. Do wear a smile.

Having a positive attitude about being at work will affect your job performance significantly. Appearing happy, friendly, and approachable at work can do wonders for your career. Never underestimate the power of a smile.

It’s OK to make mistakes.

It’s understandable to be nervous as you move into your first job after graduation or when you make a career change to a completely new company or industry. But it’s also important to remember that it’s OK to make mistakes. Nobody is perfect. As long as you’re constantly growing and learning from those mistakes and make an effort to stop making the same mistakes in the future, your co-workers will notice.

 https://tinyurl.com/93jed5bt

Work Allies vs. Real Friends: Spot the Difference! 

Workplace bonds can feel like genuine friendships, but let’s keep it real—your work allies aren’t always your personal lifelines. While they’re essential for teamwork and success, blurring the lines between professional relationships and true friendships can lead to unexpected complications.

Here’s What You Need to Know :

🔑 Work Relationships Are Task-Oriented – They’re built on shared projects, not personal trust.

⏳ Friendship Takes Time – True friends are there for you beyond deadlines and office walls.

⚖️ Boundaries Are Your Best Friend – They help you stay focused and drama-free.

How to Master the Balance : 

✔ Keep Work and Personal Separate – It’s okay to be friendly, but not every detail of your life belongs at work.

✔ Practice Kindness with Professionalism – Respect and empathy go a long way in building trust.

✔ Invest in Your Growth – Make your contributions shine and focus on career progress.

✔ Avoid Gossip – It’s a trust-breaker, plain and simple.

✔ Celebrate Team Wins – Appreciate collaboration while keeping healthy boundaries. 

💡 The Bottom Line: True friendships are built on trust and shared values, often outside of the workplace. While work allies are vital for your career, your real friends will stand by you through every season of life.

What’s your take ? Have you ever faced the challenge of setting boundaries at work ? Let’s share some insights in the comments !

🎥 Video credits: All rights belong to the original creator.

https://tinyurl.com/5n7v6d3e

Direct report complained about a teammate

 

Two of your direct reports aren’t getting along, and one of them has come to you confidentially to complain about the other’s behavior. Should you get involved? Tell the person to work it out on their own? Close your eyes, stick your fingers in your ears, and hope the whole thing goes away?

Important Note: This article doesn’t cover complaints of harassment, physical assault, bullying, discrimination, and other egregious and potentially illegal behavior. In those situations, see HR.

What could be going on?

• Your direct report wants to talk through the conflict as a way to understand it or cope and doesn’t necessarily expect you to handle the issue.
• Your direct report expects you to step in and resolve the complaint because you’re the manager.
• Your direct report already tried and failed to resolve the issue and is escalating it to you, and/or the complaint is one only a manager and/or HR can resolve.
• Your direct report’s behavior contributed to the conflict (and needs to change).
• Your direct report is exaggerating or misinterpreting the issue.
• As your team’s leader, you unintentionally contributed to the conflict and need to change your behavior.

How to handle it:

1. Thank the person for coming to you and communicate that you’re open to hearing about the issue.

You might be thinking, Ugh, this is the last thing I need right now or Why can’t they just work this out on their own? But there’s a big upside here: Your direct report trusts you. The fact that he or she is proactively coming to you about a conflict — something that many people hide from their managers — is a sign that you’ve done a good job opening the lines of communication.

If you want those lines to stay open, it’s important to reinforce the person’s willingness to share bad news. You can be thankful and show you’re receptive to hearing more, without committing to taking action:

“Thanks for coming to me about this and being honest. Would you mind if I ask some questions to get a better understanding of what happened?”

2. Ask the person follow-up questions to better assess the merit and severity of the complaint.

Your response to your direct report’s complaint will be only as good as your grasp of what happened and how serious it is. So before making a decision about what to do (or not do), ask follow-up questions, like:

• “Could you share an example or two of the person’s behavior?” This question can help surface actual behaviors (e.g., “She skipped the last three project meetings without giving us advance notice”) versus relying on subjective interpretations (e.g., “She’s flaky”).
• “Could you tell me more about what led up to it?” Context matters. You might not know enough of the whole story — just the part that frustrated your direct report.
• “Has this happened before, and if so, what were the circumstances?” A behavioral pattern usually indicates a more serious issue that has been building over time versus a one-time event triggered by something like the teammate having a bad day.
• “Have you spoken with your teammate about what happened?” This is often key! Did your direct report talk to his or her teammate before coming to you, and if so, how did it go? If not, what held him or her back — for example, is your direct report unsure how to give feedback to peers and/or incorrectly assuming conflict resolution is always a manager’s job?
• “How is this affecting your work and job satisfaction?” There’s a big difference between, say, your direct report finding someone’s habit of leaving dirty dishes around annoying and your direct report finding someone’s resistance to others’ viewpoints demoralizing. Also, be on the lookout for hesitation, discomfort, or vague avoidance. Occasionally people complain about performance issues when there’s something more serious and more difficult to talk about going on, like bullying.
• “What do you think are good next steps?” This question begins to move the conversation toward potential solutions and can help illuminate your direct report’s expectations around what should happen and who should be involved.

3. If you determine the person who complained has a role to play in improving the situation, initiate a coaching conversation.

There are some situations where it makes sense to encourage the person to take action on their own, like when the teammate’s behavior isn’t having a significant effect on performance or when the direct report who complained is at least partially responsible.

However, not everyone has learned how to effectively deliver feedback to a peer or will be self-aware enough to see how they’re part of the problem. That’s where you come in! Perhaps it’s time to start a coaching conversation with questions like:

• “What do you think you could do to improve this situation?”
• “How do you think your teammate would react to receiving feedback from you directly about this?”
• “Would you like to talk through some potential ways to phrase a feedback conversation?”

You can also offer this type of coaching in conjunction with any separate steps you might take with the teammate. For example, let’s say the teammate regularly interrupts the person, making him or her feel disrespected:

“You and I can discuss potential ways you could give her feedback, so you’re prepared the next time she does it. Meanwhile, I’ll work on it with her, too — without mentioning you. What do you think?”

4. If you determine your actions (or inaction!) may have contributed to the situation, acknowledge that and describe any adjustments you plan to make.

Many managers are eager to place the blame for team conflicts solely on their direct reports. But you’re the leader — you have a huge impact on team dynamics, so it’s worth considering what role your behavior may be playing here. For example, you may have fueled resentment between your direct reports by:

• Being unfair or inconsistent. This is often easier to fall into than managers realize. Maybe you’ve let a poor or less motivated performer get away with slacking off, overlooked a discrepancy in how you recognize your direct reports, or distributed work without enough thought or explanation. Even just the perception of unfairness, which can stem from a lack of communication, can be enough to cause frustration and finger-pointing.
• Failing to provide clear or adequate guidance. Sometimes direct reports take things out on each other when their troubles are actually rooted in a lack of clarity around what they should be trying to achieve, how their performance will be judged, and/or who owns what.
• Modeling poor behavior. Let’s say your direct report is upset about a teammate’s tendency to send texts and emails during meetings — something you realize, with an uncomfortable pang of recognition, that you’re guilty of doing yourself. Direct reports often consciously and unconsciously mirror their leaders’ behaviors.

If you identify any such areas, be as proactive as possible in owning your role in the issue. For example, let’s say you didn’t provide adequate direction for a project your direct reports are working on:

“I think part of the issue here stems from a mistake on my part. When I delegated the project, I wasn’t clear enough about the end goal. That could be a big part of why you feel like Antonio is just doing his own thing. How about I schedule a meeting for the three of us to get on the same page?”

For more ideas on how to provide enough guidance as a manager, see Are you undermanaging? Some signs you may be — and ways to improve.

5. Check in with the teammate (while maintaining the first direct report’s confidentiality) and, if appropriate, set and track relevant development goals.

What about the teammate’s side of the story? He or she is likely to have a different — possibly even wildly different — perception of the situation.

While you can’t break your first direct report’s confidence, you can probe more broadly during the teammate’s 1-on-1. Try asking questions about projects the two are working on (e.g., “How are things going with Jemele and your work on Project X?”) or general job satisfaction (“What do you feel is going really well right now, and what’s been a challenge?”).

If it seems like the teammate’s behavior really might be a problem, step into your authority as a manager and start a development conversation. You can do this while still maintaining confidentiality. For example, if the teammate is overbearing in meetings, you might tie the development goal to a team goal or skill that’s universally important:

“I was thinking this is a good time for the team to work on how we communicate with each other, especially given this quarter’s focus on improving our process. Would you be up for focusing on building skills around listening and verbal communication? I know you’ve talked in the past about wanting to improve as a presenter, and this would help with that goal as well.”

Yes, this is a bit indirect. But sometimes managers have to get creative when privacy and fragile team dynamics are part of the mix. And it will allow you to target the problem behavior and create a development plan with the teammate — without revealing your source. See our Skill-building for the future guide for more ideas.

6. If possible, try to observe the behavior yourself.

If you put yourself in a position to observe the dynamic with your own eyes, you’ll be able to address it directly (and take the onus off your direct report who raised the issue). Caution: This tip can be a poor choice in situations where one team member’s behavior is significantly damaging the morale and performance of another. Also, keep in mind that the teammate may not behave the same way twice or may act very differently once you’re watching.

For example, if your direct report complains that a teammate is overbearing when they interact in project meetings, you might ask that teammate to lead your next team meeting. Then, you’ll be in a position to give feedback about his or her facilitation based on your own observations.

Even if the person doesn’t exhibit the behavior in front of you, you can focus on the flip side of the problematic behavior to reinforce how you’d prefer the person to act:

“Nice work making sure everyone got to share their thoughts without being interrupted! That’s so important for creating a space where people can really be creative and feel respected.”

You might even offer a word of caution against what the teammate presumably did poorly when you weren’t around:

“It’s very common for meeting facilitators to do too much talking themselves, which can send a signal that you don’t welcome ideas from others. Good to see you avoid that pitfall. Keep it up.”

7. Periodically follow up individually with the two direct reports involved.

Once the issue is being addressed, you may want to put it behind you. But don’t be so eager that you prematurely assume everything’s fine. Your direct reports may be on better footing with each other. Then again, team dynamics are, well, dynamic. The problem could linger or intensify — for example, if a new event causes hard feelings to resurface.

Check in with each person during regular 1-on-1s for the first few weeks after the complaint — and maybe even for a while after that, on a monthly or quarterly basis, perhaps.

8. Check in with other team members to help guard against broader team dysfunction.

Wise managers recognize that flare-ups among two direct reports rarely happen in a vacuum. It’s entirely possible that the weak relationship between two members is affecting others who work with them or sit near them, or that the same teammate is having a negative effect on people besides the direct report who spoke up.

It’s also possible that you’ve inadvertently been undermanaging across the board (see tip No. 4). If so, you may have created a tense or confusing environment conducive to unhealthy types of conflict (remember: not all conflict is unhealthy — it can help spur critical thinking and innovation in many situations).

Even if you think these scenarios are unlikely, it doesn’t hurt to take precautions (and in fact may help improve team dynamics and morale). For example, you might make a point of asking team members in their 1-on-1s about projects involving the two direct reports in conflict. Or you could institute some opportunities for informal team-building, like monthly team lunches.

https://franklincovey.com/