Relationships to achieve greater success in life

 

To achieve greater success, building a diverse network is essential—not just for immediate gains, but for long-term support and growth.

Here are 20 critical relationships and connections to cultivate:

Professional & Career Connections

1. Current Colleagues: The foundation for daily teamwork, trust, and creative problem-solving.
2. Direct Supervisors: Vital for feedback, day-to-day expectations, and career advocacy.
3. Former Colleagues: A bridge to new opportunities and unadvertised job openings.
4. Mentors: Experienced peers who provide guidance, advice, and a "big picture" perspective.
5. Industry Leaders: Connections with influential figures can provide deep market insights and strategic direction.
6. Recruiters: Specialists in your field who can help you land your "dream job".
7. Clients & Customers: Strong ties here lead to better service, loyalty, and sustainable business growth.
8. Interdepartmental Contacts: Connections outside your immediate team foster broader organizational understanding.
9. Professional Association Members: Peers in specialized groups who keep you abreast of industry trends.
10. Consultants & Experts: Specialized external resources for solving complex problems.

Personal & Growth-Oriented Connections

11. Relationship with Yourself: Prioritizing self-care and self-awareness is the bedrock for all other successful connections.
12. Family Members: A primary support system for resilience in the face of stress and trauma.
13. Close Friends: Real friends who stay through "the mess" and offer genuine emotional support.
14. Alumni & Former Classmates: A natural network based on shared history and educational backgrounds.
15. Professors & Educators: Past teachers often provide strong letters of recommendation and industry leads.
16. Role Models: People who reflect the person you want to become; their company inspires personal excellence.
17. Community & Volunteer Peers: Connections built through shared causes that expand your reach beyond work.
18. "Connectors": People who naturally enjoy introducing others, helping you bridge gaps in your network.
19. Strategic Allies: Peer-level partners who share your goals and can collaborate on mutual wins.
20. Trusted Advisors: A "sounding board" of diverse individuals for venting ideas and receiving honest feedback.

Which of these circles do you feel needs the most immediate attention—your professional network or your personal support system?

There are six human needs: love/connection, contribution, significance, variety, certainty, learning and growth. Love/connection is the most important basic human need. In order to achieve your full potential, you will need to build deep, trusting relationships with people in all areas of your life.

Here are at least 20 relationships for you to build in order to achieve greater success in life:

A. 3 LIFELINE RELATIONSHIPS

• Peer relationships with 4 main elements (generosity, vulnerability, candour, accountability)

B. 3 VITAL FRIENDS 

• 8 vital roles (builder, champion, collaborator, companion, connector, energizer, mind opener, navigator)

C. SPOUSE/PARTNER 

• People who are married tend to live longer. Married men particularly benefit from marriage.

D. 8 COACHES/MENTORS/ADVISORS/PROFESSIONALS

• Career, health, money, spouse/partner, friends/family/kids, physical environment, fun/hobbies, personal growth

E. PEER FORUM AND OR MASTERMIND GROUP 

• Peer group of Lifeline relationships with common goals
• Who are you and what do you want to get out of life?
• What are your strengths?
• Continue to build self-awareness and self-esteem

HERE ARE 6 STRATEGIES TO BUILD DEEP, TRUSTING RELATIONSHIPS WITH THE PEOPLE ON YOUR TOP 20 LIST:

1. Get real and park your ego: looking good, being right, being defensive, playing the blame game, needing to always be in control
2. Show respect: never say anything negative about anyone, get off your high horse
3. Choose a positive perspective on people: focus on strengths
4. Share your passions: what do you love to do?
5. Share your BHAGs (Big, Hairy, Audacious Goals)
6. Share your past, present and future:
   • Past: 5 key events, 5 key choices, 5 key people in your life
   • Present: what are you worried about?
   • Future: What are you afraid of?

Book Sources

The Talent Advantage by Dr. Alan Weiss and Dr. Nancy MacKay, published by Wiley.

Who’s Got Your Back by Keith Ferrazzi

Vital Friends by Tom Rath

The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman

https://tinyurl.com/4vysfpar

It’s not just about who you know, but how deeply you connect:

Meaningful relationships can dramatically influence your career trajectory and open doors to opportunities that were previously out of reach.

❓ Why focus on meaningful connections?

➟ They provide richer, more reliable support.
➟ They enhance your understanding of industry trends.
➟ They create mutual opportunities for growth.

👉 Here’s how to build connections that are not only wide but also deep:

1️⃣ Be Genuine
2️⃣ Listen Actively
3️⃣ Show Empathy
4️⃣ Share Vulnerability
5️⃣ Offer Help and Support
6️⃣ Foster Mutual Respect
7️⃣ Celebrate Milestones
8️⃣ Remember Details
9️⃣ Be Present
🔟 Follow Up

📌 PS...Remember, networking is about quality connections, not just quantity

https://tinyurl.com/2h6c72m9

Connectional Intelligence: Which Type of Connector Are You?

I’m excited to interview my wonderful friend Erica Dhawan. Erica is the Founder & CEO of Cotential and the world’s authority on Connectional Intelligence. Named by Thinkers50 as “The Oprah of Management Ideas”, Erica is featured as one of the emerging management thinkers most likely to shape the future of business. She’s also one of the Marshall Goldsmith 100 Coaches. In this week’s interview, Erica is going to share with us the three types of Connectors as she defines them in her book, Get Big Things Done: The Power of Connectional Intelligence. Below is an excerpt from our interview.

Marshall: I’m here with Erica Dhawan, one of the great thinkers of our time and one of the 50 top leaders of the future in terms of influencing thought around the world. Erica, I love the work you are doing in Connectional Intelligence. You identify three types of Connectional Intelligence, or Connectors, can you explain that?

Erica: Absolutely! Ten years ago, Malcolm Gladwell coined this concept of a connector as one of the three types of people that create the rise of social epidemics. This idea revolutionized teams around the world and how we build this connector skillset at work.

In today’s era, we’re not just connected, though, we’re overconnected. The average amount of time we spend on email and online meetings is growing exponentially. What I’ve found in my research is that in today’s world, it’s not about being a connector. It’s about how we connect intelligently with our resources.

What I’ve found is that there are three types of connectors you need to lead dream teams today.

1. The first type of connector is a thinker. Thinkers are great at connecting around ideas. They know how to bring together different ideas. They have a lot of curiosity and courage to think in new ways.
2. The second type of connector is the enabler. Enablers are the awesome community builders. They know how to bring together all the right people. They are more of your traditional networking types.
3. The third type of connector is the executor. These are the people who are great at mobilizing.

So, think about it: once you have an idea (thinker), you get the right people (enabler), and you mobilize and turn it into action (executor). And, it’s not about being the best at all of these yourself, it’s about designing a team that leverages your style as a leader.

One of my favorite examples of this is from a woman named Jeannie Peeper. When Jeannie was four, she was diagnosed with a very rare disease called FOP. She spent 20 years going from doctor to doctor trying to diagnose this illness. She finally met a doctor who had seen 18 patients with the disease, and she decided not just to be treated by the doctor, but to reach out.

Jeannie is an enabler. She reached out to every single patient and created the first ever knowledge network for patients with the disease. Today, the network is teaching doctors, medical researchers, and university professionals how to diagnose this illness, because Jeannie understood her style and created a network of people with different skills to address FOB.

What I recommend is that everyone better understand their own style and be mindful of tapping into the diversity of their network and skills that are different than theirs as they are building teams to get big things done.

Marshall: I love what you are doing! Let me give you my personal reflection. I see myself as a thinker and enabler, but not much of an executor. I don’t like to manage anything. I have only two problems with management – one is I have not ability, and the second is that I have even less motivation. The key is to find people who are great at what I’m not great at. I love your model because you don’t have to be good at everything, just know what you are good at, what you do like doing, and then find others who compliment your skills.

Erica: Exactly. Knowing how to find the answer, how to find the resources, is more important than having them yourself. And, that’s really the quotient in today’s world. It’s being that dot connector instead of thinking we’re going to be knowledgeable about everything.

Marshall: Wonderful! Thank you!